Wednesday, February 22, 2012

BEING NICE

As women, we are often taught to be "nice" so others can feel better about themselves. We smile when we don't mean it, we laugh when someone insults us jokingly and if someone asks us to do something, whether we're comfortable or not, we do it. Why? Because the idea of one person in the world not liking us is as threatening as apocalyptic germ warfare. Or so we've been told. This mentality often makes its way into the bedroom.

I think I discovered the orgasm when I was 7. What started as an accident suddenly became an afterschool program. (Never got extra credit for it despite the fact that it was some serious phys ed.) I was convinced that I had invented a way to generate electricity inside the body and that I would keep this a secret til I was 18, then sell my idea and live off the investments. Even then, I was business-minded. Because I didn't actually KNOW what I was doing, I felt no shame for enjoying it.

Once I actually learned what I was doing I was slightly disappointed that I wasn't going to become a millionaire....but what I did learn was sexual confidence. I knew exactly how my body worked and what buttons to push, and I was always in it to orgasm.

During my 20s, I met a lot of "nice girls". What an interesting breed. This type of woman never puts her sexual needs first. She only fucks because others want her to. She never asks for anything, she never says no.

"What does an orgasm feel like?" was a question that constantly came up among my female colleagues. I couldn't believe it. We were living in the 21st century already! The ignorance, the confusion, the "I can't even look at it" mentality was simply depressing. What's worse is that they represent a majority.

But how did we women get here? Why were these women fucking then? The answer was obvious. They were having sex just to be "nice". A "nice girl" might fuck 1 partner or 500 partners, but the reasoning is always the same.

Here's the lowdown: Women who fuck for someone else, only fuck themselves.

Where sex is meant to bring pleasure, it just creates sadness. Where one would find intimacy, it's replaced with detachment. It will do the very opposite of what you want it to do.

Truthfully, I can tell you there is absolutely nothing nice about being a "nice girl".